Hemingway was right when he said to write the one true sentence, the truest sentence that you know.
Contrary to popular belief, I do not live in the past. I just think understanding it is crucial for living in the present. I am afraid of preaching to the choir, but then I look at my surroundings and take a peek outside my bubble and I do not know who has lost its mind more, if myself or my reality. Knowing that a sea of people feel the same and have worked as mirrors of the past helps. It is all macro and micro right now, I have been feeling better and certain memories are only alive as nothing but exercises of introspection. Am I too wordy? I recently apologized for overwriting, even if I actually did not feel like it. Honesty does not sell, as much as I want it to. But I still believe it is all we have, at our core is what will always remain. Even as I am well aware of my failures and performances. Am I losing my mind or just becoming more aware of it? How Courtney Barnett described the way her mind works made me realize that it’s not common to have a rambling voice that never wants to shut up at any point. It’s all a one-sided conversation that never leads anywhere.
Instagram ads and pop psychology always reminds us to do not put our expectations into how we view others, to let them be themselves before assigning them a role in their life. How can we accomplish this if we are always putting up propaganda brochures? There is always a new level to discover in every person, no matter how much we think we trust their personality. It is still projecting. Maybe I am doing it too right now.
It’s a cold night, even for September. The weather is activating certain memories, but only as a reminder that I will create new ones soon enough. As we always do. I have been thinking that this is ACL eve, I wonder who would I have seen this year. HAIM for sure. Perhaps Phoebe Bridgers. Fiona Apple does not care for the festival crowd. The Lemon Twigs had a gap in their touring dates around October. Personally, fall starts the moment I land back in El Paso and the weather is much colder than when I left. It’s not even Austin’s heat lingering, it’s always 20 degrees colder than the week before. I get sick, have a sore throat for the rest of October and I have my yearly check-up. Baseball legends get written and now I wonder what will mark the beginning of Fall. How will I know when to bring my plants inside.